The Kingdom Within
When we talk about the Kingdom, it can seem distant, abstract, futuristic.
It's often associated with the afterlife, some place other than here on Earth.
On the one hand, it is important to keep this distinction. Heaven is our home. The Earth is not.
For most Christians, living in such a way that the Earth and its customs and idols don't rule our hearts and govern our thoughts is, itself, difficult. Perhaps it's the primary carnal struggle -- and it is ultimately one that signals the true depth of our faith and salvation.
For loving things of this Earth becomes the gateway drug to "pragmatic Christianity" which leads to the prosperity gospel. Death by Pragmatism.
The counter-balance, however, is needed to live properly.
After all, merely emptying ourselves of these carnal, earthly desires isn't sufficient. It's akin to emptying a home once possessed. Emptiness is not what we want, for it can be quickly filled back up, perhaps with things much worse.
Instead, it is to be drawn near to the actual Kingdom, a concept that seems to be foreign to churches.
Yet, Jesus himself applied a geographical analogy about the nearness of the Kingdom.
One interpretation is that God's Kingdom can and does break through here on Earth. Beauty, justice, truth, health, relationships -- it's fair to say those are elements of God's Kingdom that we'll experience in inexplicable fullness.
And there's something carnally desirable to this. This tangible pragmatism can be appealing -- all these things that we associate ultimately with goodness can be ours today, here in the flesh, and this is God's Kingdom.
It's a thin line, but it's not an untrue one: God made the earth and his fingerprints must be everywhere.
The problem is the correlation between our work and his kingdom. An elder at our church, despite my correction, would say that these are God's promises....now here's our giving form.
Even prayer for these things, while not incorrect, not sinful, can in the end leave us bereft and impatient.
This dependency on external things makes us, in the end, weak. There's no need for dependence on God if our faith hangs in the balance on good things. Even miracles could not persuade the masses.
What, then, have Christians who live this life done? And why hasn't it been the focus, perhaps the foundational focus, of the Church?
The one's who truly have Christ reigning in their heart almost seem fictional: the storms of the world simply do not affect them.
But I've realized that this is the state, the minimal viable state of our belief. Not just our belief, but our desire.
Within myself, I have experienced and still do the torments of thoughts, feelings, dependencies on the good and the bad of the day, the trauma of the past, and the worries about the future things.
What, then, is the alternative?
Everything begins within. It sounds very Buddhist, non-Evangelical, new age, woo woo -- many of the things that make me cringe about evangelicals who have lost their way.
And yet, there is clear truth to this.
The peace we seek, however, is not an elusive peace from meditation and chants.
It's first a reminder we're no longer at war.
Innately, all of mankind knows we are at war with God. When our soul is a war zone, we will find ways to quench it, deny it, or numb it.
This war takes a different flavor, but in the end is built on a foundation of guilt and shame for failing to live a perfect life.
That war is often turned on ourselves, and is a doom loop, because it's impossible. Our fallen state will keep that desired goodness forever out of reach.
Peace, then, comes when we surrender the need for doing the work to letting Jesus do it for us.
Unfortunately, the church complicates it in its spiritualization.
"Just lay it at the feet of Jesus" sounds pious, but not that clear.
And lack of clarity leads to confusion. And confusion creates misguided visions of our own mind.
The first question I ask myself is, "Why do I need this thing or outcome?"
Why do I need it?
Why do you need it?
"Why do you need that higher profile, higher paying, more prestigious job?"
Answering it with honesty is the first thing to get out of our own way.
I want money, more comfort, status, validation. Name your own version.
But keep going. Keep pressing why in your journal (and, yes, I believe this is a constructive, structured, and productive way to journal).
Why do I need those things?
Because I feel shitty about myself.
Why do you feel shitty about yourself?
I don't know. Because I don't have those things?
The above shows how I would escape the loop. Those things would give me the feelings I need to quench the inadequacy.
Here's where the church fails to get granular, practical without sacrificing the truth, spiritual without introducing more haze and confusion.
What does heaven look like to you?
The answer, unfortunately, is not clear for most. It's not been clear for me, and that's a big problem.
And yet, the church has built this big industrial complex with heaven, the Kingdom, as part of the answer, and it's too vague to be actionable in our present life.
That's a problem.
The question is: "will heaven look like working at that high pressure job building something that seems huge today with very cool tech?"
No, it doesn't. Usually, heaven will look like the absence of needing those things.
I don't need a Tesla in heaven.
I don't need the bigger house.
I don't need a job in heaven.
What we ultimately need is the peace that comes from knowing the battle against our sin was won, not by us, but by Jesus; and that he could do it for us and for the world gives him full rights and access to be Lord.
That is what we should be worshipping him for and that's is the state of heaven.
So the question is, "How would you feel, what would you think about, in this heaven?"
See, this is why spending time to be clear on the Kingdom -- even if it is a Kingdom your imagine on earth -- matters. Because how we feel about it can be invited in now.
Why?
Ice baths.
One of the ideas behind taking ice baths or cold showers is that we know it is temporary. And therefore we can endure.
However, that process of being able to endure makes us healthier, more motivated, and less depressed.
This is the true state: not to be falsely optimistic, which is the "God is a genie" approach, that a good thing will happen "just 'cuz" (I will get to how to land in this space, however, with the "just 'cuz").
We must release the anger and resentment, and do so by knowing that Heaven isn't that far away after all. It is something that comes later in faith. An faith is growing to believe this is true, no matter our current circumstances.
Does that get us off the hook of doing the right things to correct situations, to enter difficult circumstances that cango badly.
In fact, it hsould give us the strength to do this; it is outcome independence because there is something that grows out of a belief in Heaven.
But that first step needs to focus on what Jesus has already done; not the vagaries of what God can do. You don't need Jesus to hang onto elusive hope and dreams.
But you need to depend upon Jesus as the one who fights the war, releasing you from guilt an shame and the need for validation.
The work has already been done.
So now go forth and do the work of the day in freedom.
Spend time in the Spirit, live with this adventure.
What does the Spirit want you to do at work today?
It may seem very carnal, but I think nothing could be more spiritual than to ask the spirit how to best please your earthly company or boss....because glory be to God.
All the crap in our lives is messing you up. Clear it out. Seek the Kingdom that is so near, and a peace that can come from seeing how the most important things in life come for free from Jesus.